I JUST TURNED ON THE PC AND THERE WAS NO START UP SOUND SO I TURNED UP THE VOLUME A BIT AND HEARD SOME STATIC AND I WENT ON TUMBLR TO MAKE A POST ABOUT THIS BUT THEN THE PC ABRUPTLY SHUT DOWN LIKE IT SOMETIMES DOES

THEN I WAS TEXTING MY SISTER ABOUT IT AND I THOUGHT I SAW SLENDERMAN IN THE PHONE REFLECTION BUT IT WAS JUST A GODDAMN LAMP

FUCKING SLENDERLAMP

AND NOW IM POSTING ABOUT THIS AND I AM VERY UNCOMFORTABLE AND SLIGHTLY UNSETTLED NOT ONLY BC I CANT DO THIS REAL LIFE SUPERNATURAL BULLSHIT BUT ALSO BEING AFRAID OF SLENDERMAN IS RIDICULOUS BECAUSE HES A FICTIONAL CHARACTER

BUT IM ALSO MAD BECAUSE IT WAS A LAMP THAT SCARED ME

FUCK YOU FUCK ME BUT FUCK YOU TWICE OVER BECAUSE I DONT NEED ANY FUCKING SLENDERLAMPS IN THIS APARTMENT I HAVE ENOUGH SHIT TO DEAL WITH LIKE MAINTAINING MY SIMS GPA AT UNIVERSITY WITHOUT SELLING HER DIGITAL SOUL TO SATAN SO FUCK YOU AGAIN SLENDERLAMP

TL;DR

I THOUGHT MY LAMP WAS SLENDERMAN AND NOW ITS CALLED SLENDERLAMP AND I AM UPSET BECAUSE OF THIS EVENT

if youre an asshole who doesn’t listen to others or is considerate in the least and dares to call themself a leader or fill a leadership position without leadership qualities there is a good chance that i will break open your ribs to unleash your undying soul and then sacrifice your soul to satan in return for a bag of doritos because thats how much you would be worth

i am literally one of those people where if i absolutely hate something or do not want something, i’ll 100% forbid it even if the thing was necessary for my health and safety and i would become increasingly angry and verbally obscene until im 100% willing to snap somebodys neck and rip them apart with my bare hands and feast on their innards

*seasoned veteran voice* in the midst of the battle, see, there’s always one thing you have to remember; no cuts, no buts, no coconuts

i hate when you play videogames and the monsters attack you all the goddamn time but when you run around and want to get attacked for like, leveling up or something, the monsters are nowhere to be found

that feeling you get right when you wake up from a nap, where you feel uncomfortable and like you have no clue whats going on

is there a word for it id like to know that word

how do you smile for a picture with friends

its the weirdest feeling in the world like

whoa these are arms what do i do with them how do i pose

is my mouth the right shape or is it too guava square shaped

yes this is a smile

beautiful

gaggrey:

i wonder if the two kids on how i met your mother will ever change clothes

does he just tell all the stories to them in one day

think about it thats like torture because there’s no way all those stories would be able to be told in one day

“but dad it’s been three days!”

sit the fuck back down im telling you how i met your mother

the requirement to being a good blog is to churn out one bad text post per day and here’s mine:

weedle beedle peep peep